Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Searching for answers...

Everyone dreams of a flawless life, a life where they get more than they can ever think of asking, a life where there is every freedom to do what one feels right, where all are loved ones, where all think highly of you and show respect. Everyone needs a life where they are respected and admired in a society which is full of values and goodness. But is it right to think so..?

We all have sentiments, we all grow attached to our loved ones, our possessions. I have a sentiment for my great possession, a Hero pen, the first ink pen, I took to school. Though it doesn`t write, though it has got scratches all over it, I still treasure it, I still treasure memories related to that little black pen. Now if someone were going to give me a brand new black hero pen and say give me yours, without a second thought I would say ‘NO!’
I like it just the way it is, even though I don’t use it any more.

So, then why is it that we don`t become sentimental with our lives. We all have had those moments, which have caused pain, suffering, and induced tears. And, so we go on dreaming about better lives, lifestyle, riches and love. We try our best to forget and rejuvenate, we always dream of a better life. We never get sentimental about the whole thing. Why is that ?

Now obviously there are going to be counter opinions where people will remark that they are much satisfied with their life and wouldn`t want to change anything in it. Not all, but atleast a few would remark so, because they have had the best until now, the happiest moments, and are still getting happier. It doesn`t mean that they are wrong, these people, could actually be sentimental about their lives, but will these feelings sustain their presence over time. Will they be sentimental about their lives, once they face immense grief or suffer from a great loss, or is it that all people somewhere down in their brains are aware of death and have the stark realization that this life is transient and hence avoid getting sentimental about it.

While browsing across different blogs, i`ve noticed that many people agree to the fact that attachment is the cause of all misery, so then can we live a loosely coupled life where we are aloof of all happening, of all near and dear ones.? If so, then what`s the purpose of life or is it because I am living a life without a purpose that I have these doubts.

What is the philosophy that can brighten up these dark corners of my mind`s crevice. Where is it`s presence and how does it influence my outlook of life.

I am a person searching for answers…
Update 26/05 : I thank all of you who dropped by and shared your opinions. I am more enlightened now and believe have met more friends, shared different views and have now more than one philosophical viewpoint to look at life. Of course I shall still be searching for more answers, and the quest continues and if anyone has a new idea to share, please feel free to teach me. Once Again thank you, friends.

32 comments:

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

hi !

lemme try helping you out a bit here

attachment is necessary if u wanna enjoy life
detachment is necessart if u wanna learn the secrets of life

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

and i am still attached to things ... tho i have grown out of many things

and i try to forget memories coz i dont wanna feel sad for all that have gone by

SCRIBBLEZ TO WAKEUP said...

Hey Srijith...Good thought...Well as I can see, it is a bit based on perceptions.....
We r able to have stronger sentiments towards an object like a pen even though we don't write with it. Do you really believe that when we move on in life, we are trading ourselves. Our outlook may change, our attitude ut our soul remains the same allthoughout. We have stages, we begin by being a fetus, grow into a kid and then an adult etc etc...We cannot stop growing at one stage completely because we are sentimental. We will still have a child within us even when we are old. Our inner core remains the same as we pass through various stages in life, irrespective of whether we become more happy or rich or poor for the matter. A tree cant be sentimental about itself and not grow as we are created to grow, to change by our creator. It is a rule. we will miss those old days when we did this or that but they will stored within us as a memory.

I hope I have not confused more than your doubt.

Hero pen....I had a green one...Loved it too!!! I guess I passed it to my sis or something like that.....:):)

starry nights said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. You have a nice blog site.I think attachment is necessary because it keeps us grounded sometimes, but if you need to start a new life and if the attachment was bad for u then you need to detach yourself.

Gaurav Jain said...

Hi Srijith. In case you haven't read the book Siddharth by Hermenne Hesse, I would recommend you read it. It will give you the answer to whether having attachments in life is really helpful in achieving the ultimate goal.

But Deepa is right, many people enjoy life because they have attachments. But let's not forget that these happy times are only temporary. My father jokes with me sometimes and tells me to look at the rickshaw valas on the road, and learn from them the secret of happiness. You will always find that they are chatting around with their friends and happy. He tells me that this is because they have nothing to lose, and so they are free minded. Once you have an attachment, you have something to take care of, and something you fear of losing - the very cause of insecurity and sadness.

priya said...

/living a life without a purpose /
If you had thought "without a purpose" you wudn't be here writing good ones.
Purpose is something we act or achieve to reach our goals.

Jackal said...

nice thought provoking post......i wish i had the rt answer....

Maya Cassis said...

I love going so deep into thought and I find that we share similar sentiments,i am searching on similar lines too.

Attachment brings a lot of misery and a lot of love.Many people give us misery but just few people give us as much love.
There is a difference in the ratio and the equation but we have not attained the secret formula yet.

For that we need mind tuning and an energetic nervous system.

Sometimes what we see as good may not be and what is bad may not be.

And I am still searching.......:)

Marthyan said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Marthyan said...

Attachments are what make a person.

While attachments are a cause of misery, misery in effect is the state when you are seperated from it.

It is just like saying that inorder to avoid something that is not the present let us stop living the moment.

So

Attach yourself to anything or anyone when you can, for then and only then will there come a time when you can happily detach yourself from life itself (The eternal Truth) - Marthyan -

Srijith Unni said...

@ Deepa : So you detach yourselves, because you want to learn the secrets of life, but why would you want to learn it`s secrets when you have no more to do with it ? I`m still thinking.

@scribblez : YOu are talking about the inner core, the soul, which never dies or never gets older, but isn`t the soul also dependent on the body in some way. Is it completely detached. ?

@starry nights : Thanks for coming by mine too. So attachment keeps us grounded, and if it`s bad you just throw it away.? So again you looking for a life which is perfect.

Srijith Unni said...

@Gaurav : Thanks! Shall make it a point to get this book and read it.But apart from that what you say is that when you have attachment, you have to take care of someone or something, True!. Though those rickshaw wallahs laughed, and were free minded, they were all working to feed their families and to take care of their lives. They were not completely detached from their lives. Were they ?

Srijith Unni said...

@ Priya : Yeah priya, you`re right and for now my purpose in life is to find out what it actually is..?!

@ Jackal : Thanks for the appreciation! and do tell me when you find an answer :-)

@Maya : Yeah, atleast this is what I expected from you. :-) I knew you would be searching. Shall work on getting the mind tuned and the nervous system energetic.

@Marthyan : Now that was an elaborately different stand point. You get attached to everything so that you can happily detach from all in the final lap of life.. Hmmm.. Quite worth a thought.

I`m still thinking. Searching more more answers to clear my mind

PRADEEP K. said...

Thank you for the honor of having visited the Chasm.

Glad to mention that I have come a long way on this path, and even found several answers that you are looking for.

I can invite you openly, since you have also been very open in asking.

You will find my answers in my Sidebar, under the Heading "My Poems". I believe that my preface and 18 chapters should help you. Please feel absolutely free to read and comment whatever you feel.

Srijith Unni said...

@ Pradeep : First of All, thanks a lot for the invitation. I truly enjoyed it, the wonders of the endless chasm..!
And you have shed some light on how everything originated from desire and in a way I think the ideas in your poems are in sync with Marthyan`s thoughts as well.
However, Poetry and Philosophy are two strange subjects which are interpreted in different ways by different people, so if you feel I have not fully grasped the message you sought to convey through your poems, please enlighten me.

Regards,
Srijith.

SCRIBBLEZ TO WAKEUP said...

Hey, Soul is not dependant on the body....Maximum, the body is dependant on the soul but one can ask if it does not mean the same....This is what the wise things tell sus and at the end of the day it is the most logical thing. :)

Srijith Unni said...

@Scribblez : In the Gita, there is a description which says so " Life is a journey, and the Soul is the traveller, the body is the chariot, the mind is the charioteer and the five senses are the five horses. Once the destination is reached, the soul alights and either boards a new chariot or wins the war and becomes on in one with the lord, which is salvation" Now based, on this philosophy, though the soul is not entirely dependent on the body, it is not entirely independent either. Both are interdependent I guess. However my question is why a soul never gets attached or has sentiments about the body, about the short journey it makes called Life.

Prash said...

Thanks for visiting my blog !

It looks like you agree with what i say about 'slavery'...

You really think that i have that 'Don Corleone ' look..when a friend of mine said that to me...i really laughed...you are the fourth person to say it.

I agree with deepa when she says
'attachement is necessary if u wanna enjoy life and detachement is necessary if u wanna learn the secrets of life'...

the personal 'value' of an object is much more to be treasured than those 'values' of dollars or euros or rupees...

I don't have any object from my childhood and i treasure...i don't know why ...i amnot like that...But i do understand the sentimental value you give to the objects.

You are welcome to my blog anytime you want.

cheers

Srijith Unni said...

@Prash : Thanks Man!, Yeah you`re right I too feel deepa has some strong philosophy in her words there.. Shall visit often..

Regards,
Srijith.

ashok said...

hi sri..thanks for dropping by my blog..u have an interesting one too..will come back and read more
cheers!

ishita said...

hey:)...thanks for visiting my space...

don't want to sound it like a know all blah blah...but personally, i don't dream of a flawless life...if at all i were to dream...i dream of a life lil less difficult...but not totally perfect! i don't think anyone actually wld have unreal expectations...with that i mean "flawless"...

and life's is about letting go of situations and people...to an extent....but only to move on to new situations and people...the only thing constant in life is change? letting go isn't a sign of being widout sentiments...memories are everlasting and they never leave us...don't u think what we decide and plan on in our lives is based on what we've experienced?

pain on the contrary makes us stronger...and like i said based on personal experience, pain taught me to value what i have more and also to improve myself and life around me...but not to forget pain altogether...for it does to an extent define the person i am today...

and searching for answers...hmmmm...that's the whole purpose of life...to watch, to question, to learn...to grow...

ishita said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Srijith Unni said...

@ Ashok : Sure do :-) You`re always welcome.

@ IShita :Pain does make a person more mature, it helps to realize some facets of life which we were earlier ignorant of.. and like you say change is constant, so though we have sentiments we learn to move on.. for life`s like that.
Good !

Priya_Satarkar said...

Hi, I guess I was at this stage of thinking two years ago.. till I read the 'Bhagwad Gita'. I guess you too have read it. Once you come to know of the fact that we are here to do our 'Karma's' forgetting what the results are, that itself answers life's biggest questions. It tells us to live a life selfless, but at the same time doing the work that we are meant to do. I guess if we look around there are so many people who are sorrowful, we could help them out and fulfill our karma.. What I feel is we should do everything with our whole heart and soul, enjoy every bit of happiness that we get from life, make others enjoy, improve the life of many.. but at the same time not to feel sad if we are not able to get the same amount of happiness from life all the time.. or if people are to break our expectations.I feel there are many more things above the sentiments attached to mundane things. We could be attached to the living things rather than materialistic things. Loving, caring and sharing selfless (you can't say selflessly is without attachment because it just means doing something without expecting anything in return). If you believe in God, expect nothing from him too for your own self.. Trust that whatever happens happens for the best... Keep doing the good work with the same zest and zeal, even though thousands of times you are hurt by others.. that's what I feel is the whole motive of life, because we are ultimtely answerable to God and no one else..

Anand Prabhu said...

hi srijith.. a very nice writeup... looks like every one have a lot of unanswered question in mind always.. i guess this is a normal human tendency...
Life is unpredictable and you dont get things u wanted always.. it is this unprecedented nature of life which makes it more interesting and make ppl work towards a better life.. ('better' here is subjective)

liked the way u have written and all the comments by fellow bloggers.. blogworld sure enlightens ppl :)

btw.. thanks for visiting my page and for your comments... :)

passerby55 said...

Hi..
"I still treasure it, I still treasure memories related to that little black pen"..."without a second thought I would say ‘NO!’"

I too did the same...
BUT ONE FINE DAY, .... i gave away the pen to a my sister's son. My sister's son told me he wrote with this pen for his final exams.

there comes a stage in each of our lives when the truths (THE ONES APPLIED TO YOU) are revealed in the smallest way.

SRIJITH i never knew that pen made me learn to detach, in doing so it made my nephew happy and me happier.....YOUR POST REVEALED THIS TO ME.


WHen things still in use,and are of no use to you give it away to the ones who need them.Let that thing move in life and give happiness to others as it gave u.

everyone of us does this, u too will one day.

Amol Surati said...

Getting fully sentimental about our lives happen, for most of the people (that includes me), when we are forced to consciously face the harsh realities of life, when there occurs comparisons between qualities of lives and we find ours inadequate. Thinking about them causes additonal pain over and above the pain we went through. The memories never leave us.

There is a tendency to shun thinking about them altogether but what I've experienced, "you can run but you cannot hide".



"Better-life" is a term relative to the current stage of our life. Once we achieve what we thought as "better-life", there pops up another set of standards that makes up our new definition of "better-life". When should I stop? At some point, the mind must be screaming "Enough! Let me accept whatever I have and feel the sense of serenity".

Several people remark that they are happy with their lives and do not want to change anything. I think a few of these must have learned balancing the urge for a better life and the craving for self-satisfaction. They must have confronted the realities and accepted to live with them to feel happy and satisfied. They can successfully sustain the happy feelings for a long time.

Srijith Unni said...

@priya_satarkar : Yes, priya, I too have found some great philosophy and answers to a lot of my doubts in the Gita. Thanks for bringing that up. And we are ultimately answerable to god, and he will go about tallying the balance sheet of our life :-)

@Anand Prabhu : Yeah, you`re right. It is nice that we can learn so much from the blogworld and to be able to interact with so many people. It`s really a gift!and yes Life, here was a bit subjective, I guess.

@passerby55 : Wow! that was a startling relevation. I narrowly missed this part, thanks. There is a lot of happiness in detachment. Thanks a lot for bringing that up :-)

@ amol surati : Yes, Amol, I agree, the term 'Better-Life' is relative and different for some people and even totally non-existent for others..That is again one of the reasons, why we should learn to love our lives more, to celebrate it more..

Thanks for all your comments. I am greatly pleased, that i`ve found a lot of answers.

Astral said...

Hi Srijith,

Thanks a lot! for visiting my space.

~*~So, then why is it that we don`t become sentimental with our lives.~*~

I guess we all are very sentimental with our lives and thats the reason we do not want to die and fear death. We all are so passionately involved with ourselves that we often become selfish when it comes to survive.

Keep writing, take care & GOD bless.

Srijith Unni said...

@Astral : Thanks a lot, for the visit. We all do want to live life forever, but i dont think all of us treasure our lives as much as we need to. However, what you are saying is also true.

Regards,
Srijith.

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