Sunday, June 25, 2006

The Quest for a Woman.

Pic Courtesy -
High sat white Helen, lonely and serene.
He had not remembered that she was so fair,
And that her neck curved down in such a way;
And he felt tired. He flung the sword away,
And kissed her feet, and knelt before her there,
The perfect Knight before the perfect Queen.
Menelaus, the king of sparta was betrayed by his wife, Helen and therefore Menelaus wages a great war, the battle of Troy and marching through Troy`s ruins, sets out to kill her, to avenge her betrayal. In the words above from the poem “Menelaus and Helen”, by Rupert Brooke, he describes how inspite of all the hatred and anger, how helen`s beauty pacifies Menelaus and how he bows down before her kissing her feet.

Women have since time immemorial been an object of beauty for Men. Man falls for her, he desires her presence in his life throughout. The feeling is a myriad of emotions, awe, happiness, thirst, sadness, and last but not the least lust. Though any woman would despise such an intrusion into her privacy and her life by a man glaring at her, a man continues to do the same. A man is alone once he grows up to be one and desires the presence of a woman companion. Animal instinct you might say, but it`s definitely more than that. We all know that by now that by his abilities to think, percieve and analyze, he is no more just a wild animal. Now when a man searches for a woman of his dreams, he does not have in mind a woman with a good figure or heavenly looks alone. He is also in search for a close companion with whom he can share anything in his life, someone with whom he can confide anything, anytime, anywhere. Not just a friend, because life is a complex jigsaw puzzle and it is the divine union of Man and woman, that helps this puzzle gets solved. There are things a man, can discuss and feel comforted, when he shares or spends time with a woman, which he cannot do with a man, or maybe I`m ignorant,but I do not stop.

Now, If you think I`m all out in support of eve-teasers, harassment and rapists, I`m not.! I support Blank Noise Project for it`s cause and I can perfectly sympathize with keshi`s posts here and here. And in fact I would sadly agree that the lack of women in many of the prominent industrial sectors, especially research institutes is due to not just internal politics, but also fear of sexual harassment, about which I`m aware of due to many friends sharing their traumatic experiences with me.

There are eve-teasers and perverts out there, I agree, but this post is mainly to insist that there is a man out there too who is sincerely looking for his woman. Physical beauty may just be an initial attraction, but there is a man who would like to look into the soul of that woman, all the while earnestly yearning that she would look into his soul too.

Again, there is an argument as to why he should admire the beauty at all in the first place. Well, I shall be very candid that it is definitely a major distraction for Man. Aren`t we all aware of how in the puranas, the gods would sent heavenly courtesans to disturb the penance of the sages. But I would persist that the distraction remains just a distraction for many a man. His quest for a woman gets completed only when both of them see and perceive each other`s souls and understand each other`s lives.
Going back to Menelaus and Helen, Menelaus never really looked at helen`s soul. He was just an admirer of her beauty, and in the second part of the poem when the poet visualizes how their life would have been afterwards, it definitely strikes a chord.
Often he wonders why on earth he went
Troyward, or why poor Paris ever came.
Oft she weeps, gummy-eyed and impotent;
Her dry shanks twitch at Paris' mumbled name.
So Menelaus nagged; and Helen cried;
And Paris slept on by Scamander side.
Paris, of Troy had been on a quest for the woman of his life and then he met Helen, thus completing his quest. Having realized after having lost the war that there is no meaning in another quest, he slept on by scamander side.


priya said...

It is really fantastic. Distraction is for both of them. Companionship and being a good friend is the real input for both men and women.

starry nights said...

nice post. interesting.

Srijith Unni said...

@Priya : Thanks! Yes, I agree distraction is for both..and the real input is as you said companionship.

@Starry nights : Hi Lalitha, Thanks for your appreciation.

Dew Drops said...

that was a gr8 piece of writing, coming from a man .. keep posting buddy

Reshmi said...

Well said and very truly said..:)

Srijith Unni said...

@dew drop : Hey there..! Yeah just felt like getting some things off my heart. Thanks for the appreciation. and about it, coming from a Man. Hey it`s a Man who is on the Quest for a Woman!!

@Reshmi : Your profile photo is fabulous. That flower, we used to have in our house in Kerala also, and I can see the roof of your house, I guess in the background. Nice selection! and about the post, Thanks a lot!!!


Very deep here and I see the dawn of a very understandable perspective apart from the the perverts. HOw much a woman means to a man. You hit the chord when you spoke about the souls being connected. Wonderful post man!

Deepak said...

Good one.
And a good explanation to some of the women out there who think that all men are perverts.

Srijith Unni said...

@Scribblez : Hi Scribblez, I guess the perspective was always there. It`s just a reflection of how a Man, thinks! And yes souls being connected, it sounds nice.. Thanks for the feedback!

@Deepak : Hi Deepak!, Thanks for the appreciation, yeah this is something women, should know.

monu said...

"Frailty, thy name is woman!"

njan paranjathallaa ... pandu "Hamlet" paranjathanu :d

Prash said...

This poem reminded me of childhood days...when I was back in school, this was my fav poem. I knew the lines by heart...Thanks for taking to those days.

You are right. There aren't only pervert men in this world. And I am sure all women know it...otherwise why are they falling in love with men ? because they find THE man of their life.

a country fellow said...

what was the immediate provocation for this post? :)

Gaurav Jain said...

I've been away with busy work for a while, but it was a pleasant treat to read this post.

Quite thought provoking, especially when it comes from a man, and the great comparisons you're making to historical anecdotes.

Srijith Unni said...

@Monu : I dont think women of these days are that frail. Hamlet, of course wasn`t wrong maybe back then.. But..
Ippo kaalam maari poyilley
Thanks a lot, for dropping by.

@Prash: Yes, prash, it is a beautiful poem! Has a lot of old world aura built around it and the imagination of the poet is simply fabulous. It was one of my favourites too. You are right, lots of women know this. I was just confirming my stance with my conscience, I guess.

@Country Fellow: YOu naught fella..! ;-) No no serious provocation (falling in love )actually, but while travelling in the weekend, a lady refused to sit in the autorickshaw along with me, just because poor me was a boy and poor me was sitting there alone.

@Gaurav Jain: Hi thanks a lot, for spending some time to share your thoughts. Very nice of you. And about a Man, writing this. C`mon, ultimately it`s a Man who has to get things cleared up.. :-)

Thanks for commenting guys!!

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

right !

men and women are naturally bound to search for each other

but u know ., for women , contrary to what is said , life is not incomplete without a man.... many women marry bcoz society expects them to .. and after marriage , while the man is completely enslaved by the woman , the woman essentially remains herself !

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

and yes , a man generally starts out percieving a woman's beauty , and only later reacher her soul !

am i right ?

Srijith Unni said...

@Deepa : I agree with you when you say, that a Man starts percieving a woman`s soul, starting from her beauty, but I am afraid, I oppose your notion, that Man cannot live a life independent of Women. THere are many great men, who have and who have walked the earth so. And at the same time, of course there are such women too. But I would say Life, is incomplete without the Union of both Man and WOman, and both those Men and women who chose to be alone, will feel so at some point of time in their lives.
I appreciate your argument!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts

a country fellow said...

sorry, just had to ask. but come on, u shouldn't let little things like this upset u.

Marutham said...

Wow!! //Physical beauty may just be an initial attraction, but there is a man who would like to look into the soul of that woman, all the while earnestly yearning that she would look into his soul too.
// Beautiful!!.... Very sensible,but many married people dont realize!! Nice post Sri!!


Marthyan said...

Nice Post Unni,

Falling in Love
The theme I love
And to it, I too did bow
When I looked at her in awe,
and from my silence it came 'WOW'

Its not Woman
The W I guess went silent over time
Woman is the result of a Man saying 'WOW' looking at his own image and seeing through it to understand what makes him complete

Everything that he feels is perfect

Gaurav Jain said...

Srijith.. Yeah, sure it has to be a man to needs to get things cleared up!!!

Srijith Unni said...

@a country fellow: Hi!, No I wasn`t really too upset. But of course that was the provocation.

@Marutham : Hi, you`re right, many people dont realize this and later suffer. Thanks for the appreciation.

@Marthyan: That was a beautiful poem, I `ve seen it before on your blog, i guess. Nice One there! and of course you`re the perfect lover!

@Gaurav : :) Hi there! Nice to see you back!

surajsharma said...

i totally agree with you, eve tesers make me sick to the stomach, it's time somebody said something

Srijith Unni said...

@suraj sharma : Hi!, Yeah eve-teasers spoil the name of 'Men' and make the society a horrible place to live.I share your contempt.!

Velu Nair said...

i guess u cant blame the woman as well..coz she does tend to get lost in a swarm of lusty, leering men ~ a crowd she had got used to, long time back in her life. :(

Srijith Unni said...

@Velu : Yes, velu, Here, I guess the effort was to give these women, an assurance that there are a group of honest and sincere men, out there who do some true soul searching, a group,I myself aspire to belong to.

Lavanya said...

hey we learned this in school! anyway well written as usual!

Srijith Unni said...

@Lavanya : Hi Lavanya.. it`s been so looong..! Yeah we learned it in school..! Nice that you remembered. Thanks for your appreciation..!

Maya Cassis said...

fantastic piece of never cease to amaze me by the quality and myriad writing style.just true,raw animalistic passion is flowing in your words here.Bravo!

Srijith Unni said...

@Maya : I was just speaking my mind here..! Thanks a lot for your words of appreciation.! But, apart from that, what do you feel about the topic..?

Maya Cassis said...

Well,Sri,there is so much to say about the basic relationship between a man and a woman.It's something so simple but made complex by emotions and everything else that come with it.
True that most men are just absolute perverts but there are those few who can control and look into a woman's heart...I mean the beauty of beauty itself.Not just the raw outer portion but the inner depth of what mystifies him about her when he looks at her.
Majority of our road-side romeos and ever lusting youth(am not talking about men alone here),just look at face value.there is no deep connection.It's like the changing flavours of an want something so bad and then it melts so fast,that everything sizzles in a minute of lust.
But what stays with you is the true essence of that individual soul and what we all should realise later on or earlier on,is that is what we are looking for...someone to complete us..perhaps.
And again If I continue speaking I may start contradicting myself,so I really am not going to say more...cos like I said I can go on and on about this.
but sad part about most things,Sri,is that most (wo)men have only one thing in the mind.I am speaking from experience....they see you,they want you,they use you and then they want to find something more fresh.

No one feels safe in comfort zone these days...hope am not getting to sound too complex so I shall stop here.

monu said...


Have u seen the mive Troy ??? its superb one... Especialy the charchter Hector :)

Srijith Unni said...

@Maya: I actually can quite see through what you feel at mind, through your words.. It didn`t get too complex ..:) Thanks for taking the time to share your opinions..

@Monu : Hi there..! Yeah i`ve seen it, awesome movie.. really..!

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Anonymous said...

Your blog was so beautifully written....May I add that I have experienced the magnitude of attraction for a man I've only spoken with via phone. Yes I have seen his photo and each time it arouses within me a desire to connect with this individual--to enter into his soul. So much so that I wrote poetry for him that truly was inspired from my soul.

Embrace me, and you'll find the essence of you
The sweetness of our first kiss so familiar yet new

Capture me with your love and linger near to me
As I take you to a place we've only dreamed to be

Longingly I come to you in the darkness of night
A moment to cherish A precious memory for life

BY KALIZA and written for
Steven C. Combs

Anonymous said...

There is a missing verse from this piece of poetry--